What Happens when you put vampires at Hogwarts
by Catriona-Yagri
Summary: 9 Vampires at Hogwarts there will chaos, hell, death eaters and two sets of twins
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Neither I nor Higitsune own Vampire Knight or Harry Potter. If we did, Ginny wouldn't have survive the Chamber of Secrets debacle.(Neither would Ron, because he's just annoying.)**

**WARNING WARNING THIS IS A CRACK FIC**

**This fanfiction is a collaboration between myself and my Beta, Higitsune. Thank you, Higitsune!**

* * *

Prologue: A Night Out

The horses champed at the bit and stamped at the ground in boredom as the selected Night Class students slowly moved away from the academy and assembled by the carriage. Yagari scowled at the horse he stood next to and turned to complain to a noticeably irritated Zero Kiryuuu and decided that he might be safer if he stayed quiet. It was bad enough that he'd been sent on this fool's errand. At least he wouldn't be inside that death trap of a carriage, even if he was driving it. Zero's horse, White Lilly, was harnessed at the front of the 6 horse team along with the mangy, ill-tempered runt of a horse he'd been given for this… mission, if you could call it that.

He was thinking of calling it Zero.

* * *

Zero was fiddling with the control exercise Cross had told him about this morning, around the same time he'd been volunteered for this latest display of idiocy. Apparently, magic was not only real (Okay, that he'd already known) but there was now a school for idiotic British wizard brats, as well as a government. What was the school called again? Hog… something to do with acne? He had enough brats to deal with just the academy, even without his brother's soul taking up space inside his head. He'd been blocking the annoyance out since Ichirou had started to sing. Something about the song had inspired an urge to attempt a particularly homicidal rampage through the academy. The fact that it _just would not stop_ probably had something to do with it. A smug feeling emanated from the corner of his mind that Ichirou had claimed. He cringed, and refocused – the silver vines he had projected from his wrists had grown thorns and were attempting to sink back under his skin.

The Night Class finally tore themselves away from their fan girls and walked over, dragging suitcases, trunks and various bags behind them. How nobody had noticed this was unnatural was beyond him. The smug bastard – Kaname – led the group into the carriage where the continued gossiping and whinging about how little they could take with them could be heard. Zero quietly thanked whatever was responsible for not making him sit in there, unless it was Cross, because this expedition was his fault in the first place. The fool had agreed to a "cultural exchange" with these British magic users while the Vampire Senate negotiated yet another treaty with the backwards society.

He wondered how long it would take before they were used as bargaining pieces. They, as in the Night Class. He'd just leave. He might take Yagari with him if he felt like it. Probably would. Although if he continued to refer to the scrawny sack of bones next to his precious mare, White Lilly, as Zero, Yagari might not make it to that Hogwarts place. He'd just have to kill any witness's first… besides, they were vampires. They didn't count as people after all. They were just beasts in human form. Even if he was one of them, he refused to acknowledge any kinship with the mongrels. He hissed as vines sunk into his skin, wrapping around his wrist in a bloody parody of a thorny bracelet.

Yagari smirked at Zero, while the soundproofing proceeded to fail and the laughter and chatter of the 8 Night Class students behind them filled the air. Zero twitched. This was going to be a very long trip…

He levelled a death glare at Yagari. If he had to suffer, he wasn't going to do so alone.

* * *

Dumbledore smiled merrily at the gathered students, who muttered rebelliously to their friends. Umbridge continued to scribble at her clipboard with an ugly expression on her face, the pink cardigan she wore not enough to protect her from the early autumn chill. It was September 3rd, two days after Dumbledore's strange announcement at the Welcoming Feast about visitors and candy.

Harry, Hermione and Ron moved away from Malfoy and Umbit- I mean, Umbridge. Malfoy was talking loudly to Umbridge about his father and boasting about Slytherin house, as per usual. The sun was setting over the lake, and more than a few students were tired, hungry and glaring at Dumbledore as he hummed quietly and ignored the collective irritation of the student body. The sun set as Umbridge finally asked the question that most of those present had been wondering. "So, Headmaster Dumbledore, why exactly have we been waiting out here for an hour and a half?"

Dumbledore cheerfully twinkled his eyes at her (Hermione had found the spell in a charms book in the library. If used incorrectly, it was permanent… which explained why Dumbledore always did that.) "My dear Professor, we are simply waiting for our guests from Cross Academy in Japan. I issued an invitation to their Headmaster – a most delightful fellow, most appreciative of the sherbet lemons I gave him. He even sent back some kind of Japanese sweet called Pocky. He agreed to send me 9 students and one of their teachers and we will be doing the same next year. I was thinking of sending Severus. I think they'd get along splendidly, don't you?"

It was now half past nine at night. The sky was dark and glittered with stars. First and second year students had been sent to bed by Professor McGonagall, overriding Dumbledore's objections by reminding him that they had class the next morning and would need their sleep. Third years had gathered by the lake with Professor Sinistra, who was leading an impromptu astronomy class. Hermione was taking notes from where she, Harry and Ron had sat under a tree while Harry and Ron were playing Wizard's Chess by wand light. Professor Umbridge had given up and gone inside to sulk. Malfoy was half asleep next to Pansy Parkinson, a 5th year Slytherin who, Ron said, looked like a pug. Blaise Zabini had climbed a tree and amused himself with attempting to hex the Weasley twins. Fred and George (or Gred and Forge, depending on whom and when you asked). After ducking a colour changing hex (the weapon of choice, considering how many teachers were around), he glanced up and shouted for a ceasefire. "I think I saw something over there – will you stop hexing me, Weasley!"

Malfoy was elbowed awake and Harry snickered as he scrambled upright. Coming up to the school the same way the threstral-drawn carriages was a black carriage pulled by a team of six horses, 4 black and the pair leading them white and grey, respectively. A man and a boy sat in the driver's seat, the boy leaning against the elder man. He seemed to be asleep, silver hair in disarray and relaxed against a rather nervous looking man, who must have been the teacher. He had shoulder length dark hair that hung down in front of one eye, preventing a clear view of his face. He seemed to be on the verge of shoving the boy away from him but too unnerved to do so. Hermione wondered aloud to Ron why the driver looked so uncomfortable. Ron was more distracted by the fact that the silver haired boy was holding a knife in the hand not clinging to the teachers shoulder. As the carriage pulled to a stop by theentrance hallthe teacher reached over and carefully disentangled the silver haired child nestled against his side, sliding him to the edge of the ledge they were sharing. When the child grabbed onto his arm and growled, the teacher raised his hand and slapped him.

* * *

Zero frowned slightly as dream-Ichirou attempted to slip out of Zero's hug. He tightened his grip, nuzzling his face against dream-Ichirou's arm. As he glanced up, dream-Ichirou's body began to cool and he noticed the deep gash across dream-Ichirou's throat and the blood that slowly leaked from the bite-mark. Who could have… had he done this? He looked down at dream-Ichirou's body, seeing the splatters of blood across his own body and…

He woke up, feeling a sharp burst of pain across his face. Blinking at the brown leather that filled his vision, he slowly glanced up to see a nervous looking Yagari attached to the arm he had been hugging in his sleep. He turned his head, seeing the group of children looking at them and quickly released Yagari's arm and darted under the carriage.

He was never going to live this down. He only hoped that none of the Night Class had seen this humiliating moment. The Smug Bastard – Kaname would use this as blackmail and Yuki would go on about how cute it had been… (He was not cute. No matter what anyone said, he was not cute.)

The next person to call him cute would die. As would anyone who ever brought this up again.

Yagari's face had been pretty amusing, though. And Yagari had slapped him to wake him up…

This meant war.

Harry stared at the space where the kid had disappeared from, listening half-heartedly to Hermione's furious muttering and nodding occasionally. The teacher, after finally managing to dislodge the sleeping boy had wandered over to the side of the carriage and opened the door, allowing the other students to stumble out of the carriage. One of the three girls in the group tripped and took down a few other people with her before she was helped to her feet to the amusement several members of Slytherin House, Malfoy and Parkinson among them.

Their teacher gestured for them to line up, the silver-haired boy reappearing at the end of the line, with a neutral countenance. Ron's muttered comparison to the Fer… Malfoy coincided with a scowl appearing on the boy's face.

Harry had to wonder how Ron could have been heard from all the way over by the entrance hall, considering the boy was standing next to the carriage and they were seated by the lake with the third years and Hermione. Ron was oblivious (as usual) and Hermione was too busy ranting about proper behaviour and standards to care.

Now, if only they were that oblivious when he was trying to do his homework - he might be able to finish an essay for once... and mope about Cedric. He was not depressed.

Yagari held in a smile, knowing that Zero would notice that he was twitching slightly, attempting not to laugh at his somewhat ragged appearance and his memory of Zero smiling and acting completely out of character (although knowing how Zero behaved when he was asleep ensured that should he ever need to be assassinated, Yagari would know when the best time to attempt to kill his student. Unfortunately, Level E's didn't sleep… maybe if they gave him an Ichirou shaped teddy bear? His brother complex had to be useful for something, after all.).

The well-known feeling of Zero's glare focused on his face, causing him to push his amusement down in order to avoid a squabble in front of the mission objectives. The other school's (he still couldn't remember the name of it. He knew it involved pigs, though…) headmaster walked over to him, babbling some inane nonsense about if they'd had a good journey (No.), if it had taken long (Far too long. Zero had been using his arm as a pillow for over five hours and he was almost out of cigarettes. He still couldn't feel his arm. At least the Night Class students had stopped asking if they were there yet after a few threats of giving Zero back his gun…) and if they were hungry (YES!) He had to wonder why the feeling that the elderly man and Cross meeting would be bad for his anti-anxiety medication bill. He'd been taking them since Zero's parents had asked him to look after their children for a while. Strangely, Zero was the instigator of the pranks that had plagued him night and day… not that he'd known until Ichirou had ratted out his brother in exchange for Zero's dessert.

He hoped that part of Zero's personality didn't make a comeback around other pranksters and a multitude of targets.

… Did that boy with the green tie standing by the identical twins in tie-dyed robes have rainbow hair?

He was doomed. Doomed to be pranked….

He prayed to whatever deity* would have him that it wouldn't be by Zero.

* * *

*Deity: A "God", "Goddess" or "Higher Being".

Reviews are really nice. Please, send me some?

...We have cookies.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Neither I nor Higitsune own Vampire Knight or Harry Potter. If we did, Ginny wouldn't have survive the Chamber of Secrets debacle.(Neither would Ron, because he's just annoying.)**

**WARNING WARNING THIS IS A CRACK FIC**

**This fanfiction is a collaboration between myself and my Beta, Higitsune. Thank you, Higitsune!**

* * *

Chapter 1: Cruel to be Kind… Kind of.

Zero twitched slightly as he caught sight of the chaotic mess that the Night Class dorms had turned into over the course of one night. It was roughly quarter past seven in the morning on the fourth of September and none of the night class had stirred since they had collapsed into the provided beds. Yagari had cracked open his eye and scowled before rolling over and going back to sleep, ordering Zero to wake him and the Night Class up at quarter to eight. (This had been at five in the morning. Vengeance! Nobody laughed at him and got away with it, for he was Ichi-... Zero. He was Zero. He reinforced the wall that separated Ichirou from the rest of his mind again.)

Now, the question remained… how was he going to wake everyone up?

Zero reached for Bloody Rose, smirking as he used the vines that Cross wanted him to learn to control to tug several of the vampires halfway out of their beds before allowing the vines to retreat under his skin. He aimed at the far wall and fired, hiding the gun behind his back quickly and donning his best innocent expression as the Night Class students flailed around on the floor or fell out of their beds. Pandemonium reigned for a few minutes as he stalked across the room to wake Yuki (She was immune to Zero's favourite tactic, seeing as he had used it on Cross most mornings until she had learned to sleep through it.) He grabbed the edge of the mattress and lifted the side, forcing Yuki to roll onto the floor and wake up, confused. Zero turned around and almost smiled at the dumbstruck or panic-stricken vampires still running around before firing again, this time at the ceiling in an effort to avoid injuring them. (It had nothing to do with Yagari's bedroom being up there. Nothing at all.)

The panicking students froze. Zero felt the vampires turn their attention to him as he gave out orders to the bloodsuckers.

"Clean this mess up. You might be beasts in human form, but I had thought you better than pigs. Seems you managed to prove me wrong yet again. Oh, by the way… breakfast started ten minutes ago. You might want to hurry up."

Senrei muttered something derogatory about Zero's parentage and buried his face under his pillow while Adio proceeded to prove that survival instincts could be ignored, even in the face of death.

"Kiryuuu-kun, why the hell are we getting up at twenty past seven? Breakfast runs till half past eight, and I'm still tired" Adio whined.

"Unlike you, Aido-san, some of us have better things to do with their mornings than be stared at by a bunch of wizard brats. Besides, with all this extra time in the mornings you might actually burn in the sun if I'm lucky. That would be amusing. In any case, I'm going to go and wake Yagari-sensei now. If you aren't ready when I get back… well, why don't we find out? Senrei-kun… I'll deal with you later. Remember that you'll be dealing with curious wizard brats for the entire day. No killing, maiming, asking about blood types – this means you, Aido-san. Yes Kuran-kohai? …you don't need to raise your hand, Yuki-kun. This isn't a class room."

Entering the Great Hall with Hermione pulling Ron behind him at twenty to eight in the morning, Harry slowly made his way to the Gryffindor house table before slouching in his seat. The new students were sitting at the Gryffindor table, seeing as it was mostly empty. Almost all of Gryffindor got to sleep in after all, unless you were friends with Hermione Granger. Most of Ravenclaw were sitting at their table, some engaged in a debate and others reading while they ate. Some Hufflepuff students were asleep at the table, some face down in their food. Slytherin had most of the upper years drinking their coffee while younger years blinked rapidly in an attempt to stay awake. The staff table consisted of Professor McGonagall, Snape (who appeared crankier than usual, a sure indicator of a Slytherin who had yet to be given coffee) and Professor Trelawney in one of her rare appearances in the Great Hall, with a bottle of sherry in front of her.

The transfer students were mostly awake, some appearing more tired than others. The kid who had been shoved off the carriage the night before by their teacher was sleeping, having pushed an empty plate out of his way so he could rest his head on his forearms. The other students appeared highly irritated, although one seemed almost terrified of the silver haired boy. Two of the girls in the group were chatting next to the frightened student, occasionally reassuring him as he clung to the pigtailed girl. The third was also sleeping next to a tall, brown-haired boy who was gently attempting to wake her.

He had to admit to himself, the students from Cross Academy were all very good looking. Maybe he could… No. Think of Cedric. Think of Sirius. He had to learn to defend himself and defeat Voldemort this year, not date. Maybe once he had defeated Voldemort… or he actually gathered his Gryffindor courage. The boys in that group looked kind of scary...

The brown-haired boy next to the sleeping girl was now glaring at him, apparently attempting to Avada Kedava him with his eyes alone. The new students were definitely scary.

Yagari shuddered, feeling the eyes of several students swivel to look at him. Zero had woken him up once at five in the morning then dragged him out of his nice, comfortable bed and shoved him into a room of confused Night Class students who flinched at loud noises and jumping whenever they saw a somewhat Zero-shaped shadow. After convincing Senrei off the chandelier and getting lost several times in this labyrinth of false steps and dead ends the group of tired, hungry people had made it to the Great Hall. Yuki was being carried by Kaname, having fallen asleep around the third or fourth time Yagari had checked the map. They sat at the Gryffindor table this morning, seeing as Zero had chosen it as his seat for the morning.

He had to make his way past his misbehaving students (stopping to slap Zero on the back of the head, which gained him an outraged glare from the bushy haired brat behind him with the redhead attached to her.) He sat in the open spot farthest away from the more elderly staff members, while still keeping him away from the drunk* and the dark-haired man.

The chill down the back of his neck as he hunched over his food told him that Zero was staring at him with Very Bad Things in mind. Usually, that just meant death and destruction, but this time it was slightly different. It was reminiscent of the times when Ichirou had been alive. Zero had followed his little brother like a devoted, overly affectionate guard dog, snapping at anyone who got too close to _his_ brother. He remembered when Ichirou had been sick and Zero had refused to allow anyone near them or go to school. The decision had been enforced with knives stolen from the kitchen and a yelled "We can take care of ourselves!" from behind a barricade of furniture stolen from the living room. His parents had been more than a little amused and simply checked up on Ichirou when Zero was asleep and made sure that Zero knew how to look after his brother. He was kind of glad that he had never had to attempt to separate the pair at that age.

He was of the mind he'd have lost more than just an eye in the attempt.

Hermione Granger was _furious._ This- this _man_ dared to claim he was a teacher? He had just _hit_ one of his Students. Teachers had a Duty to their Students (and, okay, maybe Professor Snape wasn't the best at this, but he had never harmed one of his students) and this man had _just_ –

Okay. Breathe. Think before you act.

"Ron." She started as they walked over to join Harry, "don't you think that the transfer teacher's behaviour is just a little… odd?"

"Hermione," Ron said. "It's breakfast on the first Saturday of term. How do you expect me to think this early in the morning when I haven't even eaten yet?"

"He just hit one of his students!"

"So? Snape does as well, not like you ever let us complain about him. I swear you're just looking for something to be wrong."

"It's Professor Snape, Ronald, honestly. Remember our first year? Second? Third? Or perhaps you remember last year, Ron! V-You-Know-Who is back. He killed Cedric, and he almost killed Harry! What if this is another attempt on Harry's life, there's only been an attempt to kill him every year so far - and if you two would just pay attention for once then Professor Snape wouldn't have to remind you two to keep working. Maybe you'd get better marks if you just listened to the teachers every once in a while. I'd like to see how you managed if I wasn't around to correct your essays and do your research for you, you ungrateful…" Hermione sighed, realising that Ron had long since returned his attention to the food laid out on the Gryffindor Table. Surely Harry would at least listen to her concerns though.

It was approximately fifteen minutes to twelve and Senrei was not moving. He was curled up on the top of a bookshelf in the Hogwarts Library, praying to the Ancestress** that Zero didn't look up. He'd hid up here shortly after nine after one of his muggleborn fan girls had escorted him to the Library. Zero had wandered in around ten thirty, settling down to read directly under where Senrei was hiding, causing the aristocrat to begin praying with unprecedented fervour. He had to wonder where Zero was getting the new piles of books from every so often, but put it down to this being a school of magic.

He really hadn't meant to say that. Let's face it, it had been quarter past seven in the morning and he'd been ripped away from his nice, warm bed with only a few hours of sleep. (Also, Zero was kind of scary when he was angry. Right now, he was angry at Senrei. This was not conductive to his continued health. Or y'know, life in general.)

Senrei was a Noble type Vampire. His father had been a Pureblood type Vampire and his mother a Noble type Vampire. His father had been the one to arrange the murder of the Kiryuuu parents and Zero had killed his father a few months ago, getting vengeance for his family's deaths. Senrei wasn't quite sure if the animosity Zero had felt toward his father would be extended to include him and his mother. Zero's actions towards him had changed little, but considering that Zero already regarded all Vampires as something to kill on the earliest possible occasion…

He felt someone grab his ankle and jumped, succeeding only in rolling off the bookshelf onto Zero. He tensed, fully expecting to hear the click of Zero loading the Bloody Rose, an anti-Vampire gun. When he didn't hear it, he cracked open one eye, fully prepared to run at the first opportunity. Instead he was met with Zero's most deadpan look, the one that questioned not only your sanity but your intelligence, survival instincts and genetic heritage.

"Senrei-kun…" Zero began, raising an eyebrow (How does he do that, anyway?), " …is there something you aren't telling me? Because while I am bisexual, I'm not particularly attracted to you …and I think Rima-san would be disappointed. Isn't she your... friend?"

Senrei blushed, scrambling to remove himself from the library as quickly as he could, brushing past a bushy haired girl (Geez, she had big teeth. Reminded him a little of a beaver.) who turned to yell at him before being stopped by Rima.

"Senrei-kun! I've been looking for you. Is this where you were hiding? We went down to the lake for a walk, there's barely any sun at this time of year. You should have come walking with us… besides, when Zero's angry, it's safety in numbers." Rima frowned; finally noticing Senrei's traumatised expression. "You ran into Zero, didn't you? Oh, Senrei-kun…"

"Yeah, I did. On that note, did he ever actually like Yuki-sama? Even when she was…" He glanced around, gauging the likelihood of someone over hearing, before dropping his voice. "A human? He said something earlier…" His blush from a few seconds ago rose, a hand reaching up to brush his fringe out of his eyes.

"Oh? Senrei-kun… what did he say that's got you all flustered?"

"Nothing. Just… answer the question, please. I'm still not sure quite what… Zero-san, he, uh… nothing happened"

"Tell me Senrei-kun. Please?"

"Nothing happened. I-I'm fine. So, did he ever like Yuki-sama?"

She frowned, likely deciding whether she should hound him about this later of if she was satisfied with what information she had wrung out of him. He hoped it would be that latter – she had half of his stash of pocky packed in her bag, and he didn't know when he'd be able to get more. He'd run out of room in his trunk after packing some of Ichijo's manga he'd borrowed for the trip over to Hogwarts.

* * *

* Professor Trelawney is the "drunk" that Yagari refers to at breakfast.

** The Ancestress is seen as the "mother" of all "pureblood" vampires. (Vampire Knight Cannon)

Hi readers! just a friendly reminder to please review with constructive criticism for me and Higitsune. As for flames, we've recently stocked up on marshmallows...


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Neither I nor Higitsune own Vampire Knight or Harry Potter. If we did, Ginny wouldn't have survive the Chamber of Secrets debacle.(Neither would Ron, because he's just annoying.)**

**WARNING WARNING THIS IS A CRACK FIC**

**This fanfiction is a collaboration between myself and my Beta, Higitsune. Thank you, Higitsune!**

* * *

Harry looked up, hearing the furious mutters approach that tended to signify Hermione on one of her rants about S.P.E.W or, lately, the new teacher. Ron cut off in mid-sentence, having been loudly informing most of the Gryffindor common room of the latest rumours about the transfer students. He braced himself, recognising her expression to be the one that signified Mt. Hermione was preparing to erupt.

"I can't believ- The nerve of that, that... Teacher! He – and one of the students – and they were so rude! I'd rather deal with Snape than set foot in a room with either of them. I can't believe – just – those…" She turned around slowly, sensing the eyes of the majority of Gryffindor upon her, before rallying her courage. "What?"

Fred (or possibly George, or possibly George but really Fred, or possibly Fred but really George) grinned, a sharks grin filled with malicious glee and evil intentions

"So – "he began, joined by his twin (who may have been Fred, or perhaps he was George)

"Our wonderful -"

"Brilliant – "

"Perfect – "

"Prefect – "

"Tell us -"

"What has - "

"You, our beloved – "

"Leader of Lions -"

"In such a – "

"State?"

She gaped, head turning to track their back and forward method of conversation, settling on George (who she believed might be Fred but accepted he was likely George) before scowling.

"And you! What is the meaning of these notices? Advertising for First Years to test those… _experiments_ of yours on?"

"Hermione! Don't change the subject – what happened?" Ron glared at his brothers and moved in between them. Harry and Fred (although he thought that he might have been George or perhaps it was Fred – he really couldn't tell the difference.) exchanged a long suffering look, commiserating about Ron and his lacking sense of timing. Lavender Brown and the Gryffindor Gossip Chain encircled the group, figurative tails wagging as they salivated over continuing drama of the Golden Trio.

"It's nothing – really Ron, I'm going to the library, I need to research something…"

"We'll come with you, Hermione!" Lavender barked, cutting Hermione off as she attempted to slip through the portrait that hid the Gryffindor Common Room.

They were interrupted as the Fat Lady swung open, leaving two transfer student from Cross Academy standing, the shorter student with his hand raised as if to knock while a tall blond stood behind him, glancing over his shoulder. "Excuse me, but I was told we could ask for a tour of the school after classes ended and Professor McGonagall told me to ask for a Miss Hermione Granger? The Professor said she was the Gryffindor prefect and that we should try here or the library…"

Hermione leapt at the chance, darting through the portrait and slamming it shut, cutting off the explosion of noise that followed. "That would be me. And we should probably move fairly quickly before the rest of them get out – Lavender and her hounds want gossip. Also, I think you may have just gained new fan girls."

The redhead sighed, striding forward, dragging the one of the blond boys (who appeared torn at the mention of fan girls, as if he couldn't decide whether to stay or go) in his wake, joining her in a fast walk (She was a Gryffindor. She would not run in fear… even if she wanted to.)

"So, where would you like to see?" She asked them, leading them down a side passage that apparently warped space and came out in the vicinity of the Great Hall. It was as good a place to start as any.

"Oh! Senrei-san mentioned the library earlier – he was hiding in there from Zero-kun. I don't think it worked out so well though… he looked kind of pale at lunch." The blond haired boy bounded enthusiastically after her as she used a passage that was hidden behind a tapestry that brought them closer to the library, his red-headed friend looking somewhat disturbed at the distance covered by going through a single doorway.

"Hanabusa *, one of these days Yuki-sama won't hold Kiryuuu-san from murdering you when you imply things like that. Besides, I think it was just that he was terrified. Rima-san was making sure he ate." The red head pushed the tapestry aside and shuddered, disquieted by having to step through what had appeared to be a solid stone wall until the blond (Hanabusa? It sounded Japanese…) had shoved his hand through the illusion. The blond continued to drag him up the twisting flight of stairs after their guide who opened a door that, once they had stepped into the corridor, had been covered by a painting that began to scold them.

"Excuse me, I'm sorry to butt in to your conversation like this but… what happened? Is everyone alright?" Hermione questioned, wondering if the transfers were quite… sane. Honestly, a student murdering another student for a few comments? Surely that couldn't be correct. No-one at Hogwarts would do that… not even Malfoy. Well, probably not. Unless it was Harry.

"Senrei-san said the wrong thing earlier this morning and Kiryuuu-san took exception to it. Senrei-san isn't hurt, just a little shaken. Knowing Kiryuuu-san, he'll probably let Senrei-san off the hook by tomorrow. If not, Rima-san will have to break the news to Senrei-san's mother." The redheaded student seemed calm

"Yeah, if Senrei-san's managed to get him that angry then we'll be finding dust in the dorm room and our beds tomorrow morning. Yuki-sama might be a bit annoyed, but she lets Zero-kun get away with everything. Well, so long as he has a semi-valid reason."

"Sorry, but who are you talking about?"

"Yuki-sama is our dorm president. Kiryuuu Zero-san is our head of the disciplinary commission. Senrei-san is one of our classmates."

"And this Zero, is he… somewhat… well, that is…"

"Angry, rude, mean, crazy, a jerk, scary, insane… take your pick. Trust me, we won't be offended – he's no friend of ours. Kiryuuu-kun isn't the sort of person you cross lightly though. He tends to teeter on the edge of insanity and we prefer it if he doesn't go down there. They still haven't gotten the blood stains out of the dorm room."

"What happened?"

"He tried to kill himself and everyone who tried to stop him. Not that we were trying very hard…"

"But… why would he do something like that?"

"He hates himself. It's not that uncommon, but I guess with a guilt complex like his… plus what happened with his brother, I'm not that surprised."

"Hanabusa, stop gossiping. You know what will happen if this sort of talk gets back to Yuki-sama or Yagari-sensei. I don't like to think of what would happen to you if Kiryuuu-san heard of it."

"Relax, Kain-san, I'll be fine. Kiryuuu-kun's probably passed out in a corner with his favourite knife and some books. Did you know that he has glasses, Kain-san? Sad thing is, he looks better in glasses than I do - it's not fair!"

"A knife!"

"It was confiscated before he left, but he probably pickpocketed Yagari-sensei on the way over. He's a bit of a delinquent, after all."

"But you said he was the head of the disciplinary committee!"

"The Headmaster's his adoptive father. He's been trying to convince Zero not to hate him. It's not working."

"It wouldn't have worked anyway. You know what he thinks of the Headmaster's… _associates_. Besides that, I think the only way anyone is going to get into Zero's good books is resurrecting Ichirou. And while I may know a few people with talent in Necromancy, they categorically refuse any jobs with the name Kiryuuu attached."

"With his parents reputation? I'm not surprised. But you actually asked them? Why?"

"I thought if Zero was distracted by his brother, things would be a bit quieter."

"Kain-san, Zero's the nice twin. And you saw Yagari-sensei's face when the Kiryuuu twins were in the same building. Now imagine them in the same building as us, working together to… uh, _prank_ us."

"So, they're your schools version of the Weasley twins?"

"Who's that?"

"Pranksters. Don't touch anything they give you. They were talking about snack boxes or something similar earlier, and last year they had Canary Creams – it would turn you into a human sized canary for ten minutes. It's utterly irresponsible of them, really."

"Sort of. Just imagine them being ten times worse. Trust me, if they hadn't hated each other the school probably wouldn't be standing any longer. My name's Aido Hanabusa, call me Aido, by the way – can you show us to the kitchens?" Aido laughed, rubbing the back of his head. He grabbed Kain's hand and tugged him forward, skipping a little. Kain had a vaguely pained look on his face, as if he _really wanted Aido to let go NOW, thank you very much, they were in PUBLIC_.

Hermione gaped at the pair, wondering how bad it could have been for such a thing to even be thought of. She was certain that whoever this Zero Kiryuuu person was, she'd have to keep a close eye on him as Prefect of Gryffindor House.

A delinquent who threatened his schoolmates – no doubt he'd be joining Malfoy and his lot at the Slytherin table. She suspected that this may have been the rude boy from earlier, who had sent her to fetch Professor Yagari. From what these two had told her, he was probably faking any injury for attention or some such, like Malfoy did with Buckbeak in Third Year.

And if this Zero was the good twin, then the other had probably been expelled for his behaviour. She wouldn't be surprised if they were Death Eaters – wait, hadn't Kain said something about associates? Who did they mean by that? What if they meant V-vol… she took a deep breath before deciding to use the easier name of You-Know-Who.

Wait, had they mentioned Necromancy? What if they had been involved in You-Know-Who's return at the end of last year?

She had to get back and tell Harry about this. She led them to the kitchens, then back to their dorm, and returned to the Gryffindor Common Room, mind turning over the information she'd gathered that day. This was clearly another plot to hurt Harry. There'd been one every year since they began Hogwarts, excluding third year. She barely even noticed the barrage of questions as she entered, heading up to Harry and Ron's dorm to think and attempt to form a coherent theory as to _what the heck was going on_ with the transfer students.

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	4. Chapter 4

**hey guys this is the last chapter I'm really sorry but i am discontinuing this story.**

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Chapter 4: Bewilderment, Devilry and Chaos?

Yagari rubbed at his eye patch tiredly, staring at Zero's body that was slumped against one of the desks in the rear of the classroom. The blood that soaked though a makeshift bandage around his wrist had dyed part of Zero's white shirt red and smeared his face. He'd followed the dashes of blood that tracked along the wall to find him, tucked into a corner and breathing slowly, keening in pain as his head lolled to one side.

He debated stepping closer, considering leaving Zero to bleed to death here where Cross wouldn't find out until it was too late for him to interfere. When he noticed the glimmer of silver around the injured wrist he peered closer, inhaling in shock at the odd silvery vines that shifted slightly as the roots slowly pulled out of Zero's skin. He repressed the urge to shudder, cursing Kaien Cross and his inane schemes and wondering if this (saving the brat from dying yet _again_) was covered by his contract. Knowing him, it probably was. He'd have to request it the next time he saw the man – if he didn't have to deal with this in order to get paid, then his idiotic apprentice could find someone else to do this sort of job. He wasn't a nursemaid, after all. That had been his Fiancée.

His last thought as he leaned in to shift Zero's mutilated arm toward him was that he really hoped Zero wasn't going to wake up anytime soon. If the pain was bad enough that Zero had allowed someone to help him…

This wasn't going to end well. The clatter of the vine bracelet hitting the floor as the roots were dislodged from the sluggishly bleeding wounds echoed his thoughts and caused blood to splash onto the edge of his coat and sleeve.

At least today couldn't get any worse. Famous last words.

Harry stared at Hermione as she paced the room like a caged animal, spitting out the occasional phrase that was almost incomprehensible. Ron appeared to be following along, although that was probably due to his fluency in Mouth Full, Still Talking.

She finally calmed down, still speaking rapidly and gesticulating wildly, but slowing down enough Harry could follow the conversation.

" …Kiryuuu has to be a delinquent, threatening his own schoolmates, how can their headmaster let him get away with things like that, another future Death Eater like Malfoy, no doubt - and they said he was a Necromancer! Ron, what's Necromancy in the Wizarding World? Is it like the Muggle version?"

"Necromancy? Hermione that's illegal! Only Vampires are dumb enough for that sort of stuff!"** – Ron**

Hermione continued, waving a hand at Ron absentmindedly. " And he associates with people his father doesn't approve of and he was trying to resurrect someone! Ichiaru or something, his brother I think they said. He must be working for V-Vold-, well you know who I mean. He's probably out to kill Harry, there's _only_ been an attempt every year on his life, what was I thinking, of course he's out to kill Harry, he's probably trying to get our trust before he hexes you behind your back, that rude, arrogant little –"

"Hermione, please slow down. I can barely understand you. Besides, you've only met him once; he might have just been having a bad day. I don't want to make any more enemies like Malfoy – one ferret is enough for a lifetime of trouble." Ron laughed at Harry's reference to Professor Moody's (well, Bartemius*

Crouch Jr's) punishment of Malfoy's attempt to curse Harry from behind.

"Sorry, Harry. I guess I am over reacting a little – I've only met Kiryuuu once, and he was hurt at the time… he said he had a headache… wait, there was blood in the hallway! What if it was his?"

"What!"

"Here we go again…"

"Harry, what did you just say?"

"Nothing! Just, ah… hey, Ron, isn't it nearly time for dinner?"

"Oh, yeah! I wonder what's for dinner tonight…"

"Ron! The students from Cross Academy will be sorted tonight. Don't you remember?"

"Come on, Hermione, they're probably all Slytherins anyway…"

"Ron!"

Harry sighed. Would this ever stop?

Minerva McGonagall, Deputy Headmistress of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Professor of Transfiguration and Head of Gryffindor House sighed at Dumbledore's latest exhibition of lunacy. The hall was decorated in colours more often found upon the elderly man's clothing, which had caused a few of the more fashion conscious students to… redecorate. It was now partly pink and fluffy, resembling Umbridge's cardigan. Some Gryffindor students had taken it upon themselves to show some house pride and also decorated in red and gold with lions. Ravenclaws had poked their heads into the Great Hall before making a strategic retreat to the library, which led to several Hufflepuffs taking a break from creating their own little slice of the Great Hall to visiting the kitchens to request that food would be sent up to the Ravenclaw common room. Slytherins were creating a rather… shadowy corner, interprised with Luna Lovegood's more… unusual and colourful creatures. She and Blaise Zabini had also taken to recoloring Gryffindor territory whenever they could get away with it.

Quite frankly, the Great Hall looked as if it had been painted by toddlers with an excess of paint and a deficit of sense. Or maybe they just had Dumbledore's fashion sense. Godric only knew how often she'd wanted to claw her own eyes out after being asked for her opinion on the atrocities Dumbledore regularly committed in his idea of fashion.

She closed her eyes as she dragged the traditional short stool up to the dais, while Fawkes flamed in, dropped the Sorting Hat and had a premature burning day, another victim of Dumbledore's fashion sense. She picked him up and put him on the staff table, before proceeding to systematically vanish most of the paint, leaving a Gryffindor lion, a Hufflepuff badger, a Hufflepuff painted eagle, which she spelled to its correct design of blue and bronze and a Slytherin serpent (although the painted Dark Mark had to go. Honestly, was that Mr Malfoy's work? She'd vanished the ferrets as well, as tempting as they were to leave. Mr Zabini seemed to have developed quite the artistic streak.) A mild animation charm sent the painted animals to pose at the ends of the house tables.

The protesting students looked at her, noticed the twitching eyebrow and flared nostrils and wisely ducked for cover, emerging at their respective house tables in relative silence. Minerva McGonagall smirked in Severus's general direction, mentally gloating as to her control over all four houses of imbecil- …_students _(Mrs Granger and Ravenclaw house had the good sense not to contribute to this _farce_. Mr Potter was supposed at Quidditch practice with the Weasley twins. Minerva quietly thanked whichever deity looked after overworked, underpaid teachers for small mercies.) Other teachers trooping in faltered, shocked at the near absolute quiet and pale, shaking students. The professor from Cross Academy had buried his face in his hands, muttering quiet curses upon children and idiotic employers. Filius and Pomana made their way through the cleared space, ignoring splotches of paint and pretending they hadn't been helping their houses in the attempt to paint the great hall. The house ghosts joined their respective tables as Dumbledore returned from his office with his perpetually bemused look upon his face, the one that asked "What on earth am I doing here? Where am I, anyway?" and had succeeded in infuriating several staff members. Severus finished glaring in the direction of the Quidditch pitch and stalked up to his seat at the staff table. Ravenclaws filed into the Great Hall, some still carrying books from the Library. The Gryffindor Quidditch team strolled in from the pitch with the students who had been in class or studying following them before settling, ignoring Severus's renewed glare with the ease of long practice.

Yagari wandered over to the room off the Great Hall where his students had been told to gather before the sorting, idly wondering if Zero had managed to escape the school's infirmary. Poppy, as she'd told him to call her had threatened to Sticking Charm him to the bed if he attempted to leave after Yagari had familiarised her with Zero's usual lack of regard for life and limb and issued him some calming potions, for which he was grateful. Yuki seemed frantic, rushing around the room trying to locate Zero while Kaname and Aido seemed quite smug at the idea of Zero being the first to get in trouble. Senrei seemed rather jumpy, clinging to Ruka and twitching at every sound. What had Zero done to him, anyway? Ruka looked a few minutes away from abandoning him to talk with Rima, who was keeping an eye on Yuki. Kain was leaning against wall by the entrance to the room, in his Cross Academy uniform with the shirt done up properly for once. Takuma was attempting to calm Yuki down, having returned to the dorm to sleep and read manga after breakfast and still carrying a few books with him, along with a box of pocky he was using in an attempt to draw Senrei out of his Zero induced state of terror, hoping to restore him to his usual somewhat morbid state.

Yagari opened the door to see Professor McGonagall standing in the middle of the dais by a rickety stool with a hat perched upon it. The hat moved by itself, opened it's mouth and then began to sing. It was a horrifying cacophony of sound, one that battered at the ears and caused the mind to retreat into forgetfulness – wait, he thought, that was Kaien's opera records. What had the hat been going on about, anyway? Unity, ambition, danger – of course there was danger, Zero was here. Something had been said about house qualities, such as the Hufflepuff tendency to take in anything with the ability to twitch. Brains weren't required for loyalty (or bravery, now that he thought about it).

McGonagall stepped forward, unrolled the scroll that Yagari had written both the names of Kaien's students and the correct pronunciation of their names. The professor read out the first name on the list calmly, ignoring the chattering of students around the hall with practiced ease.

"Aido, Hanabusa." She called out.

The blond haired boy wandered up to the stool, looking slightly nervous. McGonagall lifted the Sorting Hat and placed it on his head, where it remained for all of a minute before barking out

"RAVENCLAW!"

"Ichijo, Takuma."

The boy that bounded up to join her on the dais was a lighter shade of blond than the previous child had been. His sorting took less than five seconds. He smiled when the hat yelled out:

"RAVENCLAW!"

"Kain, Akatsuki."

The tall boy wandered up to the stool, seemingly unconcerned with the world around him. His sorting took the longest so far, nearly four minutes. He frowned when the hat called out:

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Kiryuu, Zero."

Silence reigned over the hall, students twisting in their seats to get a look at the by now infamous student. Senrei slipped behind Kaname, glancing around nervously. Yuki clenched her fists, muttering under her breath.

"Kiryuu, Zero." Professor McGonagall glared at the gathered students.

"Excuse me, Professor?" Yuki asked nervously. Kaname patted her on the shoulder absentmindedly, attempting to disentangle Senrei from his side. "I think he's ditching. Again. Or he might be ill, or injured, or he's gone back to the academy… this kind of thing happens a lot. Sorry."

"Yuki… I'm very sorry to say this. But pay up… please?"

"How did you know he'd ditch the sorting? I made him promise he'd come! He promised he'd come unless he was dead… ohmiancestress, he's dead, isn't he? Yagari-sensei, that's not true, is it?"

"No, Yuki, he's not dead. He's just unconscious. I think he's still in the hospital wing."

Aido laughed. "Pay up, Kaname-sama!"

"No."

"Kain?"

"…fine. What was it again?"

"You're my slave for the week!"

"…ancestor, this is going to suck… and not in a good way."

""Is it really that different from what you normally do?"

"No."

The professor stood up, walked over to each of the conversations participants and murmured something to them. Given how quickly they paled, it was likely a fairly decent threat. McGonagall cleared her throat, before calling up the next student from Cross Academy "Kuran, Kaname"

The hat hadn't quite touched his head when it cried out, shouting:

"SLYTHERIN"

"Kuran, Yuki!"

"…Hufflepuff."

"But I wanted to be with Kaname-sama!"

"Too bad" Yagari seemed to be enjoying this.

"Shiki, Senrei"

A twitchy, nervous boy moved towards the hat, only about to pass McGonagall when the hat shouted "HUFFLEPUFF!" A few muggleborn students squealed in glee, while pureblooded students looked confused.

"Souen, Ruka"

The hat settled on her head and sat there for a few minutes, before declaring:

"SLYTHERIN"

"Touya, Rima"

The last student from Cross Academy skipped up to the stool, frowning at the sorting hat before resigning herself to placing the hat upon her head. As she sat there she appeared to be arguing with the hat, before it sighed and muttered "…Hufflepuff."

She stalked over and sat next to the nervous boy from earlier, before pulling out a box of sweets to distract him. The two at the Ravenclaw table had been joined by a girl with white blond hair and a vague expression, who was asking Takuma about his manga. Aido was flirting with the nearby Ravenclaw girls, who were now giggling and blushing at his jokes. Akatsuki was staring at Aido with a concerned expression.

Dumbledore stood up from the head table, blinding nearby students with his multi-coloured robes and causing Rima, Senrei and Ruka to hide under their respective house tables. Several Hufflepuffs joined out of house loyalty, while a few of the younger Ravenclaws decided they should see if it made any noticeable difference in their thinking process.

"Students, esteemed guests and Professors, I am delighted to announce that Professor Yagari has agreed to continue his class, which will be optional for all students above first year. It is being held in the lecture theatre by Professor Binn's classroom. His subject is one that Hogwarts has never taught before – however, I believe I shall allow him to introduce it."

"Ethics, also known as moral philosophy, is a branch of philosophy that involves systematizing, defending and recommending concepts of right and wrong conduct. That said, I don't want slackers in my classroom, and I will toss you out if you aren't up to standard. Cross Academy brats, you're in my class whether you like it or not. I certainly don't. Sadly, I can't toss you out, as I'm required to teach you by my contract. Whichever of you sees Kiryuu next, tell him he has detention. Try not to destroy the potions classroom, Kuran. Other Kuran, don't kill Aido while I'm responsible. Aido… just no. No. Shiki, if you apologize now he'll stop stalking you over the next few days. If you don't… well… I suggest making burial arrangements. Souen, Touya… do your homework for once in your lives. Akatsuki… you're responsible for Aido, seeing as you agreed to a bet that made you his slave for the week. Ichijo, no books at the table. Put the manga away. Sayonara, brats."

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